This is my next must-find, and after watching the two clips below you’ll no doubt understand why once I locate it, I’m adding Nocturna to the screening list for Price Chompers Bushwick Discount Uniplex Pavilion.
Nocturna is a 1979 disco vampire movie starring the late, great Lily Munster - Yvonne DeCarlo in the titular role and featuring disco numbers by Gloria Gaynor, Vickie Sue Robinson, Anthony Hamilton, and Moment of Truth.
Here’s the opening sequence:
And a later sequence where Nocturna learns to dance. Keep watching till the end - it’s worth it.
His band must be pretty good - he can walk away from the guitar in the middle of a number and it keeps playing!
I picked up a few of these great masks at the NY Art Book Fair last month in Chelsea. They’re of the many stages of the plastic surgeries of Jocelyn Wildenstein. I took them over to my friends Maureen and Schalaun at my old job and we did a little photo shoot. Creepy right? Don’t I look great doing my Tyra-inspired deconstructed pose?
The pictures are just starting to pour in from last night and Tuesday, and here are two from my friend Beky. That’s me in my Ghost costume or as I liked to call it until the joke failed to make anyone laugh, my ghost-ume. This was on the night of my Cabbage Night Party on Tuesday - behind me you can see the eerie projection of Mario Bava’s Black Sabbath aka Three Faces of Fear, and if you look closely, the toilet paper I threw all over my apartment and the tissue paper ghosts I hung and taped all over my apartment. The costume was a huge hit - as I walked around last night it was cracking people up. Strangers would walk past me and go “OOOOOOOOHHHH!” just like a ghost, and I would do it back at them. I think it was really fun for people on the streets to see someone doing the most basic dumb costume ever, one that most people have done as a kid at one point or another. People got all nostalgic and were very friendly. Otherwise they just looked spooked, as though they’d actually seen a ghost - I have a feeling they might have been calling to their memories the scene in Halloween where Michael Myers puts on the ghost costume and kills PJ Soles. Either way it was awesome. Two tons of fun.
That’s a very spooky shot of my Ghost Cake, recipe from the Amy Sedaris cookbook, except I added a little family touch using cooking secrets I learned from my mother - Duncan Hines mix and Pillsbury Frosting in a Can. You can see the little arms made out of the sections of cake that you remove to shape the cake into a ghost. I did make it a two layer cake - for some reason I made one layer French Vanilla and the second pure yellow butter cake. I was worried people would be scared of the Ghost Cake, but everyone ended up eating several helpings, as happily as the people in Larry Cohen’s The Stuff gobbled up the mutant killer ice cream. Eerily, I found myself possessed to eat more and more of the Ghost Cake, until I realized I was shoving handfuls of it in my mouth last night at 4 in the morning, after returning from the bars. I forced my roommate to throw it out about an hour ago before I could eat any more (okay, I grabbed a few more handfuls and shoved them down my cake-hole, but whatever).
The strangest thing happened next, my roommate was bagging up the garbage, and he swears the cake moved and forced itself to fall out of the garbage bag on the floor - almost as though it didn’t want to be thrown out. I ran back to the kitchen to scarf up some more, but my roommate played the Father Karras role well, eating all the leftover cake up himself, then throwing himself out the window into the stairwell below. Whew! No haunted demonic cake is gonna make a fatty out of this skinny minnie, although it was probably good that I wore that loose fitting sheet as my costume. It hid the scary fat rolls in my tummy. Do you think this means I could end up wearing a muumuu in my old fat gay age? Nothing is scarier than the future, I always say.
PS. Entemann’s Pumpkin Pies are back in stock for Thanksgiving - now that shit is really the devil’s work! Keep away! The Power of Chris compells you!
Well it’s all over. Will write more tomorrow but before I go to bed, I wanted to post a clip from Linnea Quigley’s Horror Movie Workout, which I wanted to show at my party yesterday but the DVD didn’t arrive in time - it’s still lost in a fucking lame UPS holding pattern. Quigley is a shlock horror scream queen made famous by cult Troma-style flicks like Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama, The Return of the Living Dead, and apparently she’s somewhere in my favorite Christmas movie, Silent Night, Deadly Night. I guess to capitalize on her stardom, she made this super campy workout video where she shows you how to get in good enough shape to be a scream queen like her. It’s a hoot. I guess I’ll just have to show it next year. Until then here’s a clip to whet your appetite.
